Answers

No, no, mostly no.

Okay, I'm being dramatic. But that's what the day felt like. For real though. It was a no for the partial hospital program, which I'm really bummed about because I think it would have been really good.

I have childcare for at least one child for the rest of the week but after that I'm at a loss.

I called DCF voluntary services to see if they can hook us up with a camp or something. They can't. But they can give us a mentor for a couple hours a week. That's a start.

We've already been on the waiting list for the Intensive In-home Psychiatric Services Program, which would be really great but it's a long list. DCF might be able to get us pushed up on that list. It's worth a shot.

I called Dr. S and he said finding the right medications is going to be tough. We're going back to twice a day with the Abilify since that was better before. Then he'll add an anti-depressant next week when we see him. He said to bring him to the hospital if he gets really dangerous.

What exactly is really dangerous? As opposed to just regular dangerous?

I'll give you some examples.

Taz has attacked me with pointy objects, but not Chica, yet. But like I said in my last post, he made her bleed twice yesterday. He threw a wooden train at close range as hard as he could at her face and now she has a nice purple bruise on her forehead. Is that really dangerous? He's kicked her in the head and stomach. He's scratched her on her face. Is that too dangerous or just regular dangerous? Or not dangerous at all? I don't have any normal standards to compare to. Anyone? Anyone?

He hits and kicks and bites us. But that I can take. I'm worried about Chica. I'm worried she's going to have PTSD from living with her brother. She already flinches and hits the ground whenever he goes near her, good mood or not. She's scared he's going to knock her over or hurt her. It makes me cry just thinking about it.

I'm trying to get a home health aide through insurance but I highly doubt they'll pay for it.

The best thing that happened today is when I wrote a facebook message to my church pastor and his wife about Taz and asking if they knew anyone in the church who wouldn't mind babysitting once in a while, they literally called less than an hour later. And get this...they were on vacation! How amazing is that? The wife is a teacher at a school for kids with behavior and emotional disorders so she gets kids like Taz. She said they will think of how to help us. She also assured me that the local psychiatric hospital we would send Taz to if we had to is an excellent place. That she's dealt with them here and there and they are kind caring staff. And that sometimes they can pick up on things outpatient facilities can't because they are more intensive in their assessment. Just her phone call alone made me feel so much better about our situation. So thank God for them today!

As for tomorrow, we'll see what happens.